I don’t do adorable or cute. Especially when it comes to food that I’m making. Especially when it come to baking. My food is functional.
This is true when I’m making meals. I don’t want the plate of food to look gross, but I’m not going to plate my food like a chef in a fancy restaurant. The only “decoration” on my dinner plate is maybe a sprinkle of parsley. Though I do try to make it festive and sprinkle the parsley with flair; because, while I don’t do cute, sometimes Showbiz, with a capital S, appears out of nowhere.
When I’m baking, I’m generally all freaked out about measurements and science. If I’m lucky enough to not over/under cook the item then I am almost always vexed by the consistency of my icing. By the time I get ready to decorate, I’m kind of done with the whole baking process. I’ve slapped a lot of icing on cakes over the years.
That’s why my most typical baked goods are peanut butter cookies, brownies, and coffee cake. All of these are brown, two of which are baked in a square 8″ x 8″ pan, and none of which are embellished in any way. Just the way I like to make and eat baked goods.
Which brings me to Irish potato candy which is a delightful candy-esque nugget shaped like a potato, a perfect dessert to put on the table the week of St. Patrick’s Day. The pictures on all the recipes I found, showed adorable potato shaped candies. “I can do that,” said I. The whole technique is just mixing the ingredients and shaping them. Since there isn’t actual baking, just the motions of getting all the baking equipment out (mixer, measuring cups, etc.) I thought I would have the energy to make cute with my dessert.
I mixed four cups of confectioners sugar, ¼ stick butter, 4 oz. cream cheese, 1 tsp vanilla and 2 ½ cups of coconut. Since I could eat any one of the ingredients with a spoon without shame, mixing them all was definitely a good idea. The “batter” did taste great. Just one more thing I would eat with a spoon.
It was time to shape the candy. I looked to the picture for inspiration. In the picture the candy looks like small, baby potatoes. I’m a cook, I know how big a baby potato is, and I know if I made my candy that big, I would pass out from a sugar coma. Plus, if I made the candy the size my eyes saw, wouldn’t get anywhere close to the 4 dozen candies the recipe said I should get. I ended up with close to 4 dozen, tasty round things. After I tossed them in cinnamon I thought, “well, what have we here?” What I created looked like under-cooked hush puppies, not Irish potatoes.
Sure, they were delicious, but they are called Irish Potato Candy, not Brown Round Sugar Bombs. Anway, the next thing I bake will be brownies.